I think we're all aware that blogs can be deceiving at times. As bloggers, we're able to carefully choose which aspects of our lives to share with the world and which parts we'd rather keep private. Most often, we choose to share only the best parts, the highlight reel so to speak. And I don't necessarily think this is a bad thing. I'm certainly guilty of sharing all that is nice in my life and neglecting to share most of what isn't.
That being said, as a blogger it's also easy to fall into the trap of making life seem as though it's forever full of rainbows and flowers and sunshine. In fact, sometimes it appears as if our lives are so near perfect, that there's never a single cloud in our sky. And that's when the ugly comparisons start. You know, she has the perfect wardrobe or they always seem to travel to the nicest places or my figure will never be what hers is or they seem to have the most amazing relationship. From thereon forward, it's a slippery slope into negativity.
I can guarantee that these types of comparisons have entered all of our minds at one time or another.
And I can also guarantee that no single person's life is near perfect.
We all have our ups and downs, our virtues and our vices.
It's just how it is.
The other day I was reading a post by
Jay in which she expressed concern over coming across as disingenuous. That because her blog is so positive, people might see her as inauthentic or superficial. My first thought was that she certainly does
not come across this way. Jay must be one of the most genuine writers I know. My second thought was,
I wonder how I come across? And when I really thought about it I realized that this blog is pretty full of rainbows and flowers and sunshine.
So this is my attempt to set the record straight.
Believe me when I say that my life isn't near perfect.
My life is wonderful.
But, it certainly isn't perfect.
+ Exhibit 1: I feel guilty almost every day for leaving California. I know my parents wish I never left and I feel terrible that I'm unable to promise them that I'll move back someday. It's a good possibility. But, nowhere near a guarantee. It will depend on about a million different factors, none of which are set in stone except one. And that is that Jurgen's family will always be here. A transatlantic relationship means that we'll forever be torn between two countries. It's both a blessing and a curse.
+ Exhibit 2: I have no idea what I want to do with my life. In terms of a career, that is. Here I am studying a Master's in Industrial-Organizational Psychology and I'm not even sure what I want to do with the degree once I'm finished. It's a bit of an uncomfortable place to be in, although I'm sure the qualification will serve me well regardless of where I find myself in the future. Truth be told, my dream job would include working in international diplomacy, travelling the world, using I-O Psych and somehow also working with animals. How do I find all of that in a single career? I think about these sorts of things a lot these days.
+
Exhibit 3: I gained ten pounds on our month-long
road trip through Namibia. Don't even ask me how. To top it all off, I'm still about four pounds away from my 'normal' weight. I've been blessed with a lot of things, but an amazing metabolism definitely isn't one of them.
+ Exhibit 4: Jurgen will forever be my favorite travel partner. He's the greatest. But, that doesn't mean that our relationship is argument free. After several days straight on a road trip together, we're bound to get irritated. So when we're on the way home from Lesotho and Jurgen snaps because I'm always on my phone or when I have a melt down in Omaruru because I desperately want to hike to cave paintings and Jurgen is dead set on perusing art galleries instead, these things don't usually make it to the blog. But know that they happen. I just consciously choose to share the other 90% of our lives that is truly wonderful.
It's a fine balance, taking care not to over-share, but still maintaining an authentic voice.
And know that the above are just the few examples that I'm comfortable sharing here.
If we were sitting down for coffee I'm sure I could come up with many more.
So, what's your take on it? Should bloggers share all? Is there even such a thing as over-sharing?
Bloggers, how do you maintain authenticity without crossing the line?
I'd love to hear your opinion!
Also, I finally created a facebook page for the blog. You can follow along here!